| An angry young
maiden rode into town,
Dressed in a dust-covered white wedding
gown.
Her steed, coal black, was all covered
with sweat,
She'd been ridin' him hard, but weren't
done yet,
There were two six guns strapped around
her waist,
That some poor cowboy would soon have
to face,
For this angry gal' was known as Big
Liz'
And she was always found whar' the
action is!
She stood six foot six, and when the
guys got rough,
Liz'd tossed 'em 'round 'til they
hollered "'enuff."
Liz' was quite a 'beaut, but had no
lover,
And never tucked a cowboy under a
cover.
She was fast with a gun and a dead
shot,
She'd laid out six men in a Boot
Hill plot.
Under their names and ages, she'd
signed Big Liz'.
And then, "ya'll find me whar' the
action is."
An outfit in Dallas sold Liz' a plan,
For five hundred bucks they'd find her
a man.
They sent off Bad Bart, but when he
spied Liz'
He took of runnin' from whar' the
action is.
Swearin' she'd track him down, he'd
hurt Liz' pride.
He'd jilted Liz' as his
Mail-Order Bride!
Voluptuous Liz' checked every bar in
town,
But there in Dodge, she couldn't find
that clown.
He'd seen that dust cloud ridin' fast
his way,
And knew he'd faint chance of livin'
out that day.
They'd warned Bart about the wrath of
Big Liz',
That where she was, "wuz whar' the
action is!"
He was a'hustlin' to get out of town,
When she looked out the window, she'd
tracked him down!
She charged through the doors, not with
a gold band,
But two loaded pistols, one in each
hand.
Well, he saw Big Liz' comin', but
couldn't run,
His hand shakin' so bad that he dropped
his gun.
One shot rang out! But it weren't by
Big Liz'
The gal who wuz' always whar' the
action is.
It hit her dead center. right in the
chest,
Shot square in the middle, right 'twixt
each breast.
And thar' lay Big Liz' in the
street...stone dead,
That white bridal gown slowly turnin'
to red.
Their hats in their hands, they all
gathered 'round,
Each admiring that voluptuous mound,
The box they made was a foot higher,
they'd boast,
To fit those breasts, which were larger
than most,
Well, it took ten strong men to carry
Big Liz',
And to make certain she wuz' whar'
the action is,
They buried Big Liz' in Harry's Saloon,
Under the bar in the middle of the
room.
There they placed two spittoons, one
for each breast,
That's jes' how Big Liz' was laid to
her rest.
With deep respect for the
Cowboy's Big Liz',
They buried her right whar' the
action is!
|